Reflections on Another Year: Choosing Calm, Art, and Playing for Fun
So today’s my birthday, and I always get a bit reflective when I have my birthday. Sitting down for this birthday reflection, I feel a sense of calm. I’m not one of those who need to do a lot of things on my birthday. This day for me is really a long mindfulness session, and I’ve decided to give myself the day off. To do what I feel like doing, not what I feel like I should be doing. And there’s a difference. I didn’t post anything last year on my birthday, but I know I have had a good year. Actually, I’ve learned a lot of things.
I have learned about myself that I need to continue doing what makes me feel good, and for me, that is finally my way back to creating art specifically. Since last year, I’ve been to two awesome live concerts. I love music, always have and always will, and seeing live performances is something special and something to really treasure.
Learning for the Sake of Learning
But yeah, learning new things. Studying subjects that interest me, that make me feel like I’m growing or progressing in life. Not always something that has to be for work or has a meaning to anyone else. Taking time for this birthday reflection made me realize how important it is to protect space for art without any pressure to sell or market it.
The latest example being I want to learn how to paint a glass effect in digital painting in Infinite Painter, and that is no benefit to anyone else but me. I intend to use this knowledge in a different project.
Right now I’m still practicing, and I actually enjoy the process of it. And it’s a lot trickier than one would think, but yeah. What I wonder is what will happen between this year and next. But also, if I look back to when I was turning 30, I realize how much my life has changed over a decade and three years.
Bypassing the Hierarchy
My life is calmer now. My children are older now. I switched careers 3 years ago into something completely different that I enjoy. Most of the time, it’s work after all, so I can’t enjoy every second of every day. But most of the time, I like it, and I feel like I’m growing and learning new things and problem-solving all day long.
And I’ve come to realize that I like helping people in different kinds of ways. But I’ve also realized that I don’t really care about hierarchies, pretty much never have, and probably never will. I’ve made connections with people across teams before and still do, and sometimes it’s more about getting the problem solved than who actually gets to take credit for solving the important thing.
Creating for Myself, Not the Algorithm
On a personal note, I wanna take more time. I can’t create time, but I can try to take more time to create things just for me. It doesn’t have to be for a big art project, a blog post, Instagram, the algorithm, or anything. It could just be for me.
And sometimes I post what I create; sometimes I don’t, because it’s just scribbles on my tablet or in a sketchbook. But it’s for me; I’m learning. I still want to learn to become better at drawing, and I’ve had so many years when I didn’t pick up a pen at all. And sure, you could be like, that’s a waste of time. But also, if you enjoy doing it, then do it! And it doesn’t matter if you had a break for 10-plus years or more.
If you want to learn to do something, the only thing that’s stopping you is not prioritizing it or taking the time for it. That’s the one constraint that we all have. For me, it’s been as simple as taking 15 or 20 minutes in the evening before going to bed and being like, ‘Okay, I want to try this tool and this app and see if I can get the effect that I want’. I kind of liked it, so I posted part of that image for others to see. But yeah, it’s a learning process, and I still want to learn even if it doesn’t benefit anyone else.
Returning to Games on My Own Terms
I’ve also come back to playing games. Specifically, I want to play games for being relaxing, but it shouldn’t feel like a second job. I know for a fact that, for example, I’ve resubscribed to World of Warcraft, or at least I’ve had game time for 3 months. I never will get back into being in a guild or doing heavy raids. That’s not something for me anymore. I enjoy the solo content. I enjoy leveling, playing through the campaigns. Trying to do follower dungeons where I can just see the dungeons that I’ve never seen before. But I don’t feel pressured to join a guild or grind Mythic+ keys. And PvP? I still don’t like it, so I’m not gonna do that. The last few months of game time have been fun, immersive, and relaxing for me.
Sure, it takes time, but also if it’s time you enjoy, was it time well spent, or did you waste it? Because I think that if you enjoyed it, it was well spent. It wasn’t a waste of time, even though someone else might think it was. We all need to relax, and I’ve come to realize that I need to give myself more time. To relax and cut myself some slack. And I’ve realized that it’s okay to take a step back on days when I don’t feel energized; I may feel drained. And on some days when I had planned to go to the gym, but slept poorly, I’ve substituted the gym for taking a walk or doing some other kind of movement, just to get some movement in. Yoga is also a nice alternative. I’m not gonna push myself to stick to the plan every time, because it doesn’t feel good to do that.
Looking Ahead to 2027
I’m curious to see what will happen between 2026 and 2027. Because I honestly have no idea. I am happy that I haven’t received the question recently from, you know, the interview questions you can get when you apply for a job. ‘Where do you see yourself in 5 years?’ Don’t ask me, man, I don’t even know what I’m doing one year from now. So don’t ask me; I wish I knew, but I don’t.
The one thing I do know is that things will change. Looking back just three years ago? Yeah, my life was quite different then. If there is one thing I want to take away from this birthday reflection, it’s learning to give myself permission to just slow down and enjoy the day.
My question is back to you: What have you learned about yourself during the last year?
